dude i'm inner monologue high
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
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