awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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