I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
