I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
