hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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