Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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