I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
