but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Randomize
