idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
