At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
