you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
should my penis look like a turkey
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
