Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Randomize
