Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
We are two peas in an std pod
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Randomize