I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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