I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize