I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
