I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize
