yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
