Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
is that a dick in a sweater?
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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