so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
