Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Dignity is for republicans.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
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