It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
