i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Randomize
