Kiss
Puke
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
