You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
