jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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