I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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