Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
