dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You need Xanax blowdarts
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
