I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I'm passing your future prison.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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