At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Randomize
