ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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