i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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