Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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