Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
