He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
