I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
