He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
