You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
