I saw his package. It spoke to me.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
