SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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