WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i came on her dog
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
