I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
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