I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
