I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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