you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize