HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
