So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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