Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize