but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Just pee around me
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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